by Nur Faiqah Shahri
Ever had a thinking that you're gonna be alright but you ain't gettin' any better?
Yeah. I'm somehow feelin' the pinch right now.
I don't know how to describe it, it comes and go so easily.
Times when i'm doing at my best, It approaches and i'll start to fall.
I gotta be true. So this is what i felt just now.
I somehow still have feelings for someone and i have to know that i am in a relationship and i would break my boyfriend's heart if he were to find out about this.
But how can i ever explain this?
The worst part is that, the feeling COMES and GO!
I'm just turning into a bitch ain't i? If only my heart was'nt broken previously, i would'nt have this stupid feelings to bother me.
Sigh i thank God somehow i handled things well, I HAVE TO.
I would'nt wanna go another year of sufferings to go through Karma. Hell no.
So here's what i'm gonna do,
- Love Boyfriend. Treasure him with all i could and know who can make me happy every single day cause he's all i have now.
Well, talking about Boyfriend. I'm having a slight tiff with him.
It's kinda pathetic though cause we fought just because of a simple question.
which is,
You're not in the mood, aren't you?
He asked me whether i'm ok and if i'm not in the mood, he would'nt wanna meet up.
I said i was ok all along but Boyfriend knows me well enough and he argued back saying that i'm lying.
By right, i was lying. The actual fact was that i'm trying hard to runaway from that fuckened up feeling plus i'm having menstruation. I'm having moodswings so randomly for 24hours!
Damn it, I hate being a girl. pfft.
Yeah, we're still not in good terms now, He's not texting me and i'm not texting him.
Hahahahah common isn't it? who wants to give in, you tell me?!
HAHAHHA. funny if i were to look back at the argument.
hmm, one day left until O level Mothertongue. Oh hell motherfucker, i gotta start talking in BAHASA MELAYU. tsk. I hateeeee mothertongueeeeee.
Oh well, it's gettin' late. I have not had my meal, i'm not even close to hungry.
Damn you tummy, keep having those cramps and preventing me from eating and getting fat. >:-[
Guess i'm gonna say sorry to him after this.
Sigh, i pray so hard that stupid feeling won't be bothering me anymore. :(
I don't wanna hurt anyone neither do i wanna hurt myself in the end.
I can't bear the pain :(
Guess i'd talk to him about this tomorrow if i were to see him.
hope he'll have his mind wide open.
Hmmm. Goodbye, Love you readers (L)
Labels: i'm still trying.
